Problems Give You Worth

I'm so important that if I don't do well, 

there will be destruction.

I don't have an internet connection for two days now. I can only imagine the number of notifications and messages I have in Facebook, posting about my new home and new year’s resolution… or my employers flooding in my inbox yelling about all the delays that I’ve caused because of being absent for five consecutive days. I can hear them scream right now… just inside my head. You’ll be amazed at the number of times I cursed my internet service provider— I thought about getting an application in Guiness for this new swearing record. I have said $@%# for so many times in 3 days.

But I’m thankful because of this problem.

I’m not sounding super martyr. I’m thankful.

Really.

Being away from cyberspace gave me time to think of some other things. I was away from the computer for 72 hours. If you know me by heart you won’t believe I can do such a hard thing. I’m married to this computer. With my job and hobbies here, I just can’t look for a reason to go anywhere else. This is The Thing.

Because I had a temporary legal separation with my computer, I had the chance the spend time with my friends. I was forced to listen to their jokes, ghost stories and help them with their problems. I became a better person with a strong purpose for 72 hours. I had a good sleep. Because I had nothing left to do, I was forced to meditate and walk back and forth without realizing that I’m starting to look stupid.

And about my new home…

It’s perfect.

It depends on how you define ‘perfect’.

I live in a quiet place down south. I’m not good at counting square meters but this room is decently small. I brought with me most of my stuff including my PC and printer then several books. I need to go back to Manalili to get the remaining stuff. I have a lot of things to place here.

I brought a friend with me and sometimes some friends come and visit. I have really nice neighbors who think we were happy people. I left my problems several kilometers away from here. I often laugh aloud with my friends and spend time with them in the balcony and enjoy the evening.

And the balcony? Perfect.

If you know my standards, you’ll know what ‘perfect’ means to me.

The balcony has a sofa (and the color’s my ex’s favorite). It’s a good place to enjoy a warm cup of coffee. There’s a huge tree at the side of the house. I love trees. :)

This is a small space I’ve rented for a decent amount. When I say decent, it would mean that it’s quite pricey but very reasonable. As what I’ve said on my previous post, I don’t have a decent job. Renting this space would mean asking myself ‘What was I thinking at the first place?’. But I really love this place. I want to stay here for a long time. I want this to be my new home.

There are always pros and cons.

But the cons never outnumbered the pros.

Yes, renting would mean a lot of expenses, et cetera. There will be responsibilities and obligations to face in order to live. But who said I hate responsibilities? Who said I’m allergic to obligations? I love these. These things give me a sense of purpose. That if I don’t perform the tasks that I’m committed to, a lot of things will fail.

I’m so important that if I won’t do well, there will be destruction.

That if the plane will lose one wing, all the passengers will die, their families will mourn and the airline company will surely fail. Tourists will be having second thoughts about traveling and tourist spots won’t generate income. A lot of people will starve and the world won’t become a better place… Just because of one lousy wing!

Problems would seem to look like pain in the butt for most of us. But if we try to look at them in a different way and believe in the old saying that ‘everything happens for a reason’, they will come natural for us.

That’s all for now. Have to eat. :)